5 months. gone. and we've been looking forward to it so much. we'd thought that this day would never come.
still, 23 jan. its here.
mixed feelings. i thought i'd be happy that its finally over. now i feel kinda reluctant to leave. sheesh, its the post-event depression again. i hate this, i duno why am i the only one feeling it this way.
i dont miss the work, i dont miss the waking up and travelling. i think most of all, i miss the bunch of crazy peeps, tp or np, who spiced up the 5 mths.
fixers, 3 hrs lunch, laughing at supervisors behind their backs. i'll miss them all.
but i think the most impt reason for keeping me from jumping for joy is the uncertainty.
will i be able to complete my mp? will i get good grades? will i get into uni?
everyone started discussing abt uni all of a sudden. i duno why but i just dint have the mood to do so.
i lost my laptop. which means mp has gotta be retyped from scratch. well done me.
the heavy heart even made me not interested in phuture. when they told me that it was full house, i was just like, oh wells. i just need a sleep and think through stuff. maybe wake up and not feeling so depressed.
maybe this goodbye is a preview of end-of-poly. 5 mths and im like that alr. what will i become of if its the 3 yrs i had hated so much.
i dont understand myself. the older i grow to be, the more complicated my thoughts seem to evolve.
the past week made me realise quite a few facts. and the above paragraph was one of the most overwhelming fact.
which made me feel like blogging. or else i wouldnt even have bothered.
i duno, maybe i just shdnt post any of my entries, since blogs have become so commercialised and fake. msn, sms as well. i think technology has changed us all. which explains why i just repel it.
i mean it. one day i'll escape to somewhere secluded where technology cnt reach me. the world is just too noisy.
forgive me for the over-pessimistic post. oh who am i kidding? im just talking to myself again, thats what i meant by technology driving me crazy.
i miss my laptop ):
