determined.

fine la. i ren ming.

but i wont give up. just you wait. wait and see.

and i dont like repeating myself. you find my blog full of complaints and shit, THEN DONT READ. I NEVER ASKED YOU TO.

no pun intended.

1) captains ball match.
lost. nvm. its not that we're not good. its cos we dont have strategy. wth i alr said that im a defender since forever and not an attacker or goalkeeper why on earth do they still have to put me there? why do you think i dont play nball/bball but only vball and cball defence? cos i have sweaty hands ): nvm we still have next yr.

and isnt it always the case? if you fail to do your job, you get blamed and deemed as lousy. but when you do your job well, no one praises you. so i tried to praise everyone (:

and emily dear's shoes make wonders ((:

2) jo and momo's bday.
i duno why i procastinated for like 1 whole month. but anw, we had fondue at hd with jo gx and momo. ahh! zafir and xz thought momo was my bf cos she's so butch. and ken too! oh dear.

3) tp rawks.
alp was.. the sun had never been this merciless. omg and i dont like mohawk. nvm la got hj with me. and that benox gl was one of the pack leaders. sounds wrong but, hell la. and i still duno is name. anw, SO UNFAIR LA. those who went for gl interview gets to go to tp rawks as pl. i also want! stupid soonpoh's fault. and mine too la. sheesh, so much for being cheap.

ohoh! and i saw mingbei too. fiona's friend from rss. and i rmbr her somehow. ah whatever.

4) test.
oh my gawd i cnt believe i failed maths stats 1!! fuck i was expecting full marks. oh fuck. blame myself for being complacent. i checked and rechecked before leaving the class but turns out i dint read the ques properly! fuck it. and i failed organic chem too! ah that one expected la.

but ive never failed a paper in poly before ): and not to mention chem. and maths. okay maybe once, but that's not counted cos everyone else failed too.

i need tuition la! and i need mugging partners too ):

5) random.
maybe i shdnt work alr. im only like working once a week now. but i still haven been watching my beloved tv and im still not having enough sleep.

aiyah i only have myself to blame for comitting myself in so many things. now i feel like im drifting from elf. doesnt matter anw since they dont like me in the first place.

and then im having mixed feelings, whether to quit or not. cos i seriously agree with liwei, i dont like the management. i know they are good. but cnt you give chances to others? fuck. and i dont wanna quit cos i wanna prove to them that i can do it too. its just that they dont wanna give me chance. and everything also ignore me right?

FINE. I'LL PROVE MY EXISTENCE TO YOU. and i'll start from sister's island.

just you wait.

complains ):

i really dont like their management. its not as if we dont wanna take part right. is they dont let us lor.

and isnt it always the case? the chio gets everything.

anw i keep seeing ppl at work! like simin and her bf. ahhhahah her bf looks so much like teehao, only beng-er. even the way he walks and talks. so teehao-ish. and then i saw alice and her family. wah! first time nv see them tgt.

and weini too. her dad is has the membership card so they went to redeem the cake. but i thought they were only buying it, so yes i dint think much la. until closing.

cos ryan and cas dint know if the redeemed cake was supposed to be counted as sold or what. sth like that la. then they were damn stressed over it and i think they discussed for quite some time. so i was like, who is that idiot who redeemed the cake, cuaing them so much trouble. and when i msged weini after work, she told me that the cake was redeemed. opps i just cursed her ):

anw, although we were all so pissed with someone at work, it was super funny! cos she became the butt of all our jokes (: and hey! we're not racists! i love sat's crew ((: joanna melanie ryan cas ivan. hahaha jokers of all. too bad mon ken and zafir werent there ): nvm! there's more to go ((:

anw ryan said that although mel was new, i like damn click with her. hahaha cos we're both as bitchy! plus joanna, we're the 3 bitches of haagen dazs (: i just dont wanna work with shihui and ash.

cya. that guy really has ap la. everyone agrees. but he changed me back to sun, but im still not with serena anymore! CRIES. what a bastard! argh.

sighs. my wallet. i dont wanna talk about it alr la since i got it back. although the money's gone. seems like is fated that i should lose my wallet every 2 years. does that mean that i shdnt bring such a memorable wallet to school? then what?? just stuff the cash somewhere? sighs. but anw i dont think dok still treasures that wallet. so no point for me still treasuring right?

like i said, the past is gone. sentimental is stupid.

and i really think that _______ is so ____ (fill in the blanks yourself). like after knowing more freshies in ____, he totally ignore me la! wtf, this kinda friend man. maybe he doesnt want me
in hr. that explains it. and gl too.

oh freaking tpsu. its their loss not to have hj and me in prog. like serious, im not bragging or consoling ourselves.

i guess i cnt change the habit eh? wells, too bad im your typical type b (: hey gek&jenn! your bf is type b ((:

anws.

my friends wanted to join ELF so i roped them in. no wonder im so darn good at it ((:

grins. hj i want it now! cnt wait cnt wait (:

arghhh i dont wanna mug! i duno how to study for test la! sure die one. charles, if you lose to me then you really must go bang wall alr.

i want my eyecandy )):

i think its really byebye eyecandy alr ):

but i still want my sa eyecandy T.T desmond maurice let me crash la ):

die die die die die

no cellb today ): argh i want my sleep.

i am seriously gonna die. no joke.

like i've never felt so useless and stupid in my entire life. at least in evs, all i need to do is to call weini or to snap a pic of the geometry ques and mms her. in htm, all i had to do was memorise memorise. and i can pon lects like nobody's business and still understand every single shit, or even get a B.

that's how slack business is. the only stress part is when it comes to exams and you'll have to mug all over again. BUT thats only for that bloody week.

over here, its like 2 weeks to term test and im alr losing my mind. my brain is saturated, but with nothing! like, i feel like opening up my brain to examine it, but i think i'll have a hard time since its so puny and i cnt use a microscope for nuts.

speaking of microscope, bmic is rubbish. i swear i am so not going to bmt in yr2 la. but then again, they might not let me choose specialisation in yr2 since i haven completed my credits. which means, i'll still be a freshman in yr2 and a junior in yr3 then a senior in yr4. gahhh.

i hate bio like crazy. why are the guys like so zai? seriously. i think im gonna be like the last in class. why cnt she let me take hap first?

anw, WEINI I NEED YOU ): i shall call up her soon. sighs whoever heard of being a tutee at poly? and i thought rht was over.

speaking of rht, math stats 2 is coming to haunt me. like, my retribution for poning rht. argh should have never listened to them and be a guai kia right? then i'll be able to "drop" math stats 2 and take csas. I WANNA TAKE CSAS LA. cries.

okay no more complains. smack me if i complain one more time. serious. i wont scold you. or maybe i will. but just quote me and i wont (:

MUG MUG MUG MUG MUG!!!

little faith
brightens a rainy day
little fear
you know you cant go away
dont hide yourself in a corner
you have my place to stay

sorrow has come to say goodbye
open up
you'll see the happy sunshine
keep going on with your dreams
chasing tomorrow's sunrise
the sprit can never die

sun will shine, my friend
won't let you cry, my dear
seeing you shed a tear
makes my world disappear
you'll never be alone
in darkness

see my smile, my friend
walking on with you
holding hands
you have got to believe
in this darkest journey
we're meant to be your friends
that's what a friend should be

(: fencing oh fencing!

to you. sorry.

sorry for my reaction. its not your fault lor. dont blame yourself please.

and after so long, im only feeling abit better cos she assured me sth. but still, i need assurance on your part. but i duno how to tell you. i guess its harder then i thought.

everytime i start to open my mouth, i start tearing. and i really did at mushroom today. and i had to act strong infront of gek. i dont want her to think that her sotong is a weakling ):

and those stuff i told you, i guess the problems had always been me. i know it. just that i duno why. you see, no one bothered to tell me. that's the problem.

baaaahhhhh.

grrrr. why are you doing this? i know you have the right but dont you think its abit too much? dont you realise that, if i had never rejected that job, you wouldnt have gotten it in the first place?!?! i think you were the one who asked tim for the job, not the other way round okay. and he asked me first! like waaaay before you. he asked me during june lor!

wt replied me. and i know what she says is right. i should talk with them. but i dont wana risk it ): i dont want us to drift away like i did with jo gx and km. and i duno how to tell them.

work. i really detest her man. i nv do anything wrong then she show me that face. wtf. she even slam the menu at me la. pls la you quarrel with him then come and take it out on me isit? you think you got STAR damn big la. who knows, you might have gotten it because of him! sheesh. bloody flirt.

cya was better with serena. cos we have more common topics, like gossiping! haha opps. but cos we got to go to transit and it was better there! cos its busier and that blur blur sp guy talked with us too. the sad thing is, ppl prefer to approach serena than me. and, isnt it always the case? the chio gets everything. sighs. blame myself for being ugly ): but popeyes still rock ((:

i feel bad for not going eco. but sighs. you cnt blame a girl for having too many commitments! and because of this, i had to give up the rare opportunity of stand chart! shit. they dont come knocking on your door twice. who knows, next yr, tim might not be working on it anymore. cries.
and you wouldnt have the chance to take over me.

pics pics (:

my mood's better now (: cos i found pics of my ec!!

hj says he's beng ): gek says ___'s cuter. OMG. they should see him personally la. anw its not the looks that i ec. its the heroic act (:

and they all agree that my sa ec is cuter! hahaha yayness (: see my taste!

okay la that sounded so desperate. but i sooo wanna see them ): esp SA ((:

my timetable sucks ):

today was irritating. the timetable seriously suck leh. its like forever changing. and i cnt access to the subs on ole la. damn it so i duno if they changed the lects/tuts. oh man.

so i practically wasted my whole day in school. you know what, i actually dint have to go to school at all. but i stayed in the lib for 10 whole hours! no joke. my playlist of 150 songs i heard it like twice.

i used to tell hanjun i dont mind being a loner. then i can hang ard the lib. sometimes when the gods want to punish you, they answer your prayers. man, am i punished!

girls! i need you ):

course transfer.

Hi Sheena

The course transfer approval letter is ready for your collection at the One-Stop Service Centre, during office hours.

Regards
Admissions Office
Email: Admissions@tp.edu.sg
Fax: (65) 6783-3031

okay.

Admission No: 0606848
NRIC No FIN: S8921307Z
Name: GOH WANNING SHEENA
School: School of Applied Science
Course: DIPLOMA IN BIOMEDICAL SCIENCE
Class: AG14
Year Join: 2006
Year of Study: 1

:( i suddenly feel so weird saying im from the school of applied science, diploma in biomedical science. guess i'll have to get used to it all over again.

dear butterfly,

how are you now? are you living well in your current place? or have you gone back to savannah alr? wells, its all too late for you to go back now. blame it on your curiousity. or rather, its my fault that i dint help you out of the bus that time. guess its no use saying sorry now yea?

anws, keep me updated about your life. i will too. all the best (:

and break a leg uh.

yours sincerely,
prince mato.

333th post (:

aiyah. i realise my blog is getting boring. like me. the nolifer of all nolifers. its like, school work school work and occasionally eco elf cya elvoodoosa. ))):

and i duno why hotmail keeps hanging up on me. its not me who flood the account la! go find those who did that to me ):

maybe i should work less. i haven listened to my playlist for like 2 months alr! omg. and i haven touched tv for.. 2 days? sobs. and i haven crashed sa! and i haven gone about planing outings for s05 and og16 ): not to mention even go for the outing. oh wait. no one's gonna plan it if not me. sighs. no initiatives at all! er, maybe they dont even care la.

anw, its really byebye htm alr. i hope i made the right choice. even though there's a weee bit of bu she de in me. but then i realised, maybe they dint care after all. yea, maybe i got it all wrong.

i duno la, its alr goodbye and i wanna keep that good image of them in my memory. but that lil voice in me kept warning me not to fall for it. i guess, once bitten twice shy? i dont wanna be so defensive and paranoid either.

just pray that ag14 would be better. even a lil beter would be nice (:

oh yea, here's a true story. i swear i dint make it up. its like hell, god's arrangement that i should witness this. anw, here goes.

i was going to board the bus from home to go to simei for work la. then somehow this butterfly flew into the bus. there was still ard 5 mins to the departure time so the butterfly had ample time to struggle out. i couldnt help it cos i was seated right at the back (my fav seat) and he was like flying ard the driver's seat.

time ticked by slowly, 5 mins was soon up. the poor lil butterfly still couldnt find its way out despite the door being wide open. no one nearby was helping it, not even the driver. i couldnt make my way over cos it was quite crowded.

sadly, the bus departed. on the way out, the butterfly kept banging itself against the emergency exit at the back where i was seated. i think he sort of got its directions right alr, but it was all too late. the butterfly is on a journey now, to simei. it was obvious that he dint wanna leave savannah. i guess he misses his friends and family. but, they dont. because on the way to simei, not a single butterfly bothered to fly and chase after him, or to look for him.

maybe its because the butterfly was curious about the outside world and wanted to fly somewhere else and landed himself in the bus. or maybe he dint feel at home there, so he wanted to leave home for a better place. yet, no one noticed that he was missing.

when the bus finally reached simei, i tried to guide him out but he kept struggling. i think he's afraid of the new world out there, thats why he dint wanna leave the bus, hoping that it'll bring him back home.

finally, the bus driver told me that she will save the butterfly and ask me to get off the bus. as for where she set him free, i dont know. i can only hope that he is happy now, wherever he is.

oh. my. god. its like.. what the hell, movie or something? a movie of my situation? wahlao, poor butterfly, are you my brother or something?

and i dont like shihui!! argh you think you got star then very big isit? big dumb flirt.

cya was.. blah. i dont like. maybe just that day la. due to unforseen circumstances. i thought it'll be nice, but no it was torturous. physically and mentally.

1st day. and im alr dying. HELP I CNT COPE ):

work. school. cya. eco. elvoodoosa. friends.

:X

i feel so blah la ): hey it rhymes. like i rmbr qin's bra-ha-ha. omg those days.

damn paiseh today! cos life sciences ended 1 hour early and i dint know. hahaha seriously life sciences is such a drag i really felt like 4 hours'd gone. anw so i rushed all the way back to biz. i saw the room and just went in la. and cos it was kaori sensei in there so i dint suspect anything. until i sat down.

i saw emily dear's ec opp me. and that bitch daughter of a slut. sheesh. then i was like, am i in the wrong class? and for a full 5 mins, i was talking to this girl beside me, she was telling me what they had done in the past hour, which i thought was only 5 mins!!! omg then sensei came and showed me the attendance list. only then i realised im in the wrong class T.T

sheesh so i grabbed my bag and rushed out. omg in front of that bitch!! fuck it. and i saw cas in the lift while going down to lib. seriously, i think there's something wrong with my eyes. why do i always NOT see the ppl i know? its always them who calls me first. like that time douglas ob the bus and in the lift.

finally it was time for MY tutorial and when i went it, sensei dint recognise me. omg thank goodness.

and i ponned oc1 today ): and lucky for me, LOI FAILED OC1 TOO (: so there's someone to accompany me, even though he's not nice.

the other day, after i went to look for dr vijaya, kim asked me something and i really teared. i dont want it this way. i just hope that my decision wasnt a spur of the moment. after all, ive considered like 2 whole months. and now, they're making me dong yao. the nearer the deadline comes, the more i dont feel like changing. omg. i really hate changes. i just hope that it wont be the same as sa. i was so eager to leave sa for poly, because i felt like no one cared. and now i regret it so much. its the same way for htm. now i realised they cared. at least some. even though i can count with 1 hand and still have leftovers. but then again, you'll never know. after all, the world of hospitality is ever hypocritical.

change is the only constant thing in the world.

alrights. off.

anw, this is for soonpoh. SOONPOH IS A KAYPOH. hey im good at rhyming ((:

happy halloween ((:

went to settlers with eco on fri. met cheryl first at mrt then janelle they all came. wilson was alr there la! ahhaha cheryl and i were saying he doesnt look the kind who will wait at mrt. so he waited at settlers for like 1 hour :X played pit (recommendation from gek!) and taboo and snorta (that stupid animal game). oh man its like pace chalet all over again. hahah the same old games. but somehow, snorta with eco was much more fun. haha think its cos of minghui and zhihao. man, what kinda frog goes BLEURD. and which cat WHEOWS!?!?!

sat. went vivo to distribute flyers. as usual, cheryl and i were the earliest. sighs. anw it was damn boring la. rushed off to work halfway. sorry eco!

sighs work work work. no lifer. but it was damn eventful.

power failure on sat! hahaha. and i got my first comments card (: i was lucky la, cos the customers were damn nice.

sun. stupid desmond district manager came ): and he made up push out the ice cream machine and mop the floor! omg can you imagine the whole basin being black? i almost puked while wahing the plates la. ): and we closed the shop at 2330! cries.

anw rewind. i stupidly went over to serve him without knowing who he is. and evil ivan nv tell me also. shirley was somewhere doing something and cas went to b3. so ryan, i duno what he was doing la. nv warn me also ): and he asked alot of stupid questions and i was seriously stunned. cries. then ryan told me who he is and i was like die die die.

damn tiring. then shirley was telling me zao zhi dao jing tian bu yao zuo gong. yah lor! and cas was complaining too. 4.50 only have to do so much sai kang. wah lao. but i dint know he's 4.50 also. hahah.

and my arm still hurts la ): shit the scar is damn ugly ): how?!?!

brought the ice cream mooncake for gek and hj on mon. jenn wasnt free so i'll give her another day. wahhh damn diff to eat sia. and hj accompanied me to collect pace's results! haha thanks gal, i needed the support.

went to celebrate halloween with elvoodoosa ytd (: i dint wanna go jap alone so i asked hj to crash. hahah then in the end she couldnt make the surprise for us. opps sorry. anw her book is pervertic! haha as in disgustingly heavy. i almost died carrying it ): and before she came, i was damn sad cos i was reminded about those stuff i mentioned on my previous entry.

AND MY EC CRASHED TOO (: yayness! i think he dint wanna wake up early for his today so he crashed ytd. and lucky me! cos i was thinking of poning jap ytd and to crash his today. but thank goodness i dint! hahah.

(sorry, sidetrack abit) and i saw him today after school. hahah he was doing the project i think. the one so many ppl are doing. sighs maybe i should have stayed for maths stats 1. i might get the chance to take the same bus as him! ahhaha (:

back to halloween. so we waited for gek and jenn to finish their psycho. oh yea, and on the way to tm, i was once again reminded of that thing. sheesh. anw, we headed for fish and co! yays fishy fishy! oh man the ambience, rocks la! and the food too! gek jinxed me! hahaha. then hj and i gave the gals the fruits. hahah are we considered the fruits family now? shall post up the pics some other day.

oh yea this reminds me. i haven touched my cam and shutterfly for eons! like since i left sa. sighs does this mean i only have sa on my mind?

hahah! omg kone's hu si luan xiang's mv is so funny la. i cnt stop laughing. (: and why does ivy sound so much like evonne?

and i still cnt get the stuff on my previous post outta my mind. oh wells, shant think of it now. maybe, some other day!

something fishy this way comes (: